


No One Wears Leather Like Draco (The Draco Malfoy Song)

by RJLupin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Boyband, Comedy, Draco in Leather Pants, Fandom, Filk, Gen, Hogwarts, Out of Character, Parody, Post - Order of the Phoenix, Singing, Song Lyrics, Song Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-14
Updated: 2014-10-14
Packaged: 2018-02-21 05:20:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2456252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RJLupin/pseuds/RJLupin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I became involved in the fandom in late 2003, and one of the earliest things I remember learning was that in the fandom, Draco Malfoy had leather pants. Branching off this concept, I filked this song shortly afterwards about Draco and his pants to the tune of "DuJour Round the World" from the Josie and the Pussycats movie. If you don't know the song, that's fine, it works as an... interesting read? Thanks for the memories, fandom.</p>
<p>No one's a Slytherin like Draco<br/>Leather no one's wearing like Draco</p>
            </blockquote>





	No One Wears Leather Like Draco (The Draco Malfoy Song)

**Author's Note:**

> "No One's a Slytherin Like Draco" filked to "DuJour Around the World" from the Josie and the Pussycats movie. Originally filked March 2004.

_**SCENE** : The Great Hall. There is a stage set up that slightly resembles the Dueling Club stage. All the students are around it, and all of the girls are screaming. Rita Skeeter is there and she commentates.  **Note** : in the song, '...' means that the note is held and crooned over some more notes. You know what I'm talking about if you've heard the song._  
  
 **Rita**  (spoken)  
So, Hermione. How do you feel?  
  
 **Hermione**  (spoken)  
I'm so excited! I just love Draco!  
  
 **Harry and Ron**  (groaning)  
Oh Hermione...  
  
 **Rita**  (spoken)  
And Ms. Chang, how about you?  
  
 **Cho**  (spoken as she cries hysterically)  
I know that I should be really sad that Cedric died, but I can't help it! I love Draco!   
  
 **Rita**  (spoken)  
And Mr. Flint?  
  
 **Flint**  (spoken)  
Oh yeah. Me and Draco. We're like brothers, you know? Meh  
  
 **Rita**  (spoken)  
And what do we have here?  
  
 **Pansy**  (waving a 'Marry Me Draco!' sign)  
Draco, I love you! Marry me!  
  
 **Hermione**  (screams)  
Merlin's Beard! Here he comes!  
  
 **Cho**  (screams and cries more and begins fanning her face with her hand)  
Oh my God!  
  
 _Draco emerges, wearing black sunglasses, a leather jacket, and some leather pants. Crabbe and Goyle come out behind him, dressed in black, but not leather. The music begins, and the girls scream loudly again as the boys begin to dance boy band style._  
  
 **Draco**  
Yeah...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
No one's a Slytherin like Draco  
Draco!  
 **Draco**  
Oh, oh...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Leather no one's wearin' like Draco  
Draco!  
 **Draco**  
Ooh...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Nobody beats Potter like Draco  
When he starts rulin' you'll  
Wish you could be him  
Draco!  
  
 **Draco**  (taking off his leather jacket and throwing it in the crowd)  
This is the life  
To have a fancy name like 'Malfoy'  
About my dad  
Well, Potter he will help destroy  
At my mansion house-elves do my chores and  
I can strut around and tell them 'you keep scrubbing all those floors'  
  
Of a pureblood family  
And I'm rich, you know my name is  
 **Draco, Crabbe and Goyle**  
Great Draco Malfoy  
  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
No one's a Slytherin like Draco  
Draco!  
 **Draco**  
No one is...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Leather no one's wearin' like Draco  
Draco!  
 **Draco**  
Draco...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Nobody beats Potter like Draco  
When he starts rulin' you'll  
Wish you could be him  
Draco!  
  
 **Draco**  
I'm number one  
The greatest wizard of Hogwarts School  
And anywhere  
'Cause you know I'm at the top of cool  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Livin' large forever, yeah  
You won't see me without my leather...  
  
Of a pureblood family  
And I'm rich, you know my name is  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Great Draco Malfoy  
 **Draco**  
Draco...  
  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
No one's a Slytherin like Draco  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Ooh yeah  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Leather no one's wearin' like Draco  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Like Draco...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Nobody beats Potter like Draco  
When he starts rulin' you'll  
 **Draco**  
When I start rulin'...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Wish you could be him  
 **Draco, Crabbe and Goyle**  
Draco...  
  
 **Draco**  
Leather like Draco  
Oh yeah  
My leather  
My leather  
My leather...  
My leather...  
  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
No one's a Slytherin like Draco  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Oh yeah  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Leather no one's wearin' like Draco  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Oh...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Nobody beats Potter like Draco  
When he starts rulin' you'll  
 **Draco**  
Leather baby, leather baby, ooh...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Wish you could be him  
Draco!  
  
No one's a Slytherin like Draco  
Draco  
 **Draco**  
Ooh...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
Leather no one's wearin' like Draco  
Draco  
Nobody beats Potter like Draco  
 **Draco**  
Ooh...yeah...  
 **Crabbe and Goyle**  
When he starts rulin' you'll  
Wish you could be him  
Draco!  
 **Draco**  
Draco...


End file.
